~Your kids are becoming you...and you don't like them...but your
grandchildren are
perfect!
~Going out is good..
Coming home is
better!
~When people say you
look
"Great"...
they
add "for your
age!"
~When you needed the
discount, you paid
full price.
Now you get
discounts on
everything...
movies,
hotels, flights, but
you're too tired to
use them.
~You forget
names.... but it's
OK because
other people forgot
they
even knew you!!!
~The 5 pounds you
wanted to lose
is
now 15 and you have
a better chance
of
losing your keys
than the 15 pounds.
~You realize you're
never going
to
be really good at
anything....
especially golf.
~Your spouse is
counting on you
to
remember things you
don't remember.
~The things you used
to care to do,
you
no longer care to
do, but
you really do care
that you
don't
care to do them
anymore.
~Your spouse sleeps
better on a lounge
chair
with
the TV blaring than
he or she does in
bed. It's
called their
"pre-sleep".
~Remember when your
mother said,
"Wear
clean underwear in
case you GET in an
accident"?
Now you bring clean
underwear in case
you HAVE an
accident!
~You used to say,
"I
hope my kids GET
married...
Now, "I hope
they STAY
married!"
~You miss the days
when everything
worked
with
just an
"ON" and
"OFF"
switch..
~When GOOGLE, ipod,
email, modem....
were unheard of, and
a mouse was
something
that
made you climb on a
table
~You tend to use
more 4 letter words
...
"what?"..."when?"...
???
~Now that you can
afford
expensive
jewelry, it's not
safe to wear it
anywhere.
~Your husband/wife
has a night out with
the guys or gals
but
is home by 9:00 P.M.
Next week it will be
8:30 P.M.
~You read 100 pages
into a book before
you realize you've
read it.
~Notice everything
they sell in stores
is
"sleeveless"?!!!
~What used to be
freckles are now
liver spots.
~Everybody whispers.
~Now
that your spouse has
retired ...
you'd give anything
if he/she would find
a job!
~You have 3 sizes of
clothes in your
closet ...
2 of which you will
never wear.
~~~~But old is good
in some things:
old songs,
old movies,
And best of all, OLD
FRIENDS!!
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